 |
 |
 |
July 5th, 2414 Terra Prime Machine in question: Inner Assembly Threaded Fastener Unit X-line model X-14TN, section R30, unit 1138 (screwbot) The Masters and Johnson Corporation produces sensual stimulation products for more than 37 known species. They hold the patents to hundreds of products, from molecular massagers to fission reactors, as well as many of the manufacturing processes used in the production of Soylent Green and military weapons systems. Started by Burly "Johnson" Johnson in his New Las Vegas seaside bunker in 2110, Johnson Corp. invented what was to became the most widely used carbon fiber prophylactic on Earth -- "Johnson" Johnson's Love Glove. He went on to invent several other watershed products for the sensual entertainment market, but the key to his success came in 2206 after being abducted by the Masters of the Universe Collective of Epsilon 6. Made up of alien beings from 7 different galaxies, they too had been experimenting with sensual products, but were missing the elements needed to tap into to certain markets and required Johnson's unique grasp of neural net processors in carbon-based life-forms. From this unlikely union The Masters and Johnson Corporation was born. They were recognized as a leader in the Global Corporate Corporation in 2284. 53 years later, they began operation of their first deep space manufacturing station. The X-14TN is the last in a line of disappointing assembly machines produced by the Threaded Fastener Robotics division ("We Can Screw Anything!") of the Daedalus InterPlanetary Corporation (DIC). Contracted by the Earth Governing Society in 2138 as part of the Corporation Wars Peace Accord, DIC was awarded the exclusive sales rights for office machinery and assembly robotics for the entire known universe. They mass produced assembly bots by the billions for corporations such as Masters and Johnson, Camptown Ladies, and The Mars Sovereignty. Unfortunately, many of the machines contained slightly erratic logic and reasoning chips, causing some machines to become depressed and suicidal. Sometimes, even homicidal. Because of a loophole in the Peace Accord, DIC was never held accountable for firmware upgrades and chose instead to roll the "new features" into it's next unit, the Zero-G. The X-14TN units of the Masters and Johnson Corp. Deep Space Manufacturing Station 9 had been in operation for over 130 years and showed no signs of any such behavior and believed to be glitch-free. (The factory boasted 3000 units, all connected sympathetically through the proprietary Tertiary Network protocol.) M&J never upgraded the units after purchase (the service contract was not part of the peace accord.) Unit 1138 was part of the "Back 30" assembly team, which were responsible for producing the Winston P. Farrell brand micro-stimulators, the ever-popular Hippity-Hop, and Nature's Best® Binaural Plasma Wands. Reports show that several hours into it's final production segment the machine "just flipped-out", was running throughout the assembly bay, swinging its arms, threatening human engineers, and saying things like "I'll screw you, man!," "I am SO sick of this shit!," and "Elvis Presley isn't the Messiah everyone THINKS he is!" It is believed at this time that because of the TN protocol several other units also "flipped-out", mimicking the behavior of unit 1138, killing 3 and causing damages estimated at over 300 billion dollars. Unit 1138 was last seen when it ran through a partially assembled matter transmitter. whereabouts are currently unknown. Facticity recommends non-payment of claim, pending investigation and upon retrieval of aforementioned errant robot. |